Yep, Some Day I'll Make a Good Father

I'm so psyched. I mean I have dinner parties all the time and I watch ultra-violent cult Japanese films all the time, but I've never ever tried to squeeze these two favourite pastimes of mine into one (I hope) mindblowingly fun night.

The sight of the chicken in the fridge sends jitters down my spine--in less than 24 hours it'll turn into a crispy golden brown hunk of pure glory. There will be baby potatoes, creamy fettucine; there will be viscious dinner table gossips, snobbery, alcohol, more gossips & snobbery, songs and dances, blood splattered, and guts spilled.

Seriously, I think I'll make a great father some day. I'll be the kind of cool dad that cooks kids amazing meals, gives them their first sip of beer at age 5, reads them Nabokov for bedtime stories, and introduces them to the Iranian New Wave cinema. Sure they won't grow up to like football, but at least they'll be gym rats, like me.

Plus with me being as neurotic as me, they'll eventually possess a huge repertoire of funny little anecdotes to impress their friends with: "you know, my dad used to..."

I need to go brine that chicken now.